2017 has well and truly been the most testing year I have ever experienced to date. Looking back on the last 365 days, I learnt the true meaning of making sacrifices to achieve whatever it is that you want to. Whether you're sacrificing time, money or pleasure, you'll have to sacrifice something to reach your end goal.
Returning to university after getting swept into the world of work, City life and the systematic 9 - 5 isn't the easiest of things. You don't realise how you get stuck in this never ending routine of waking up, commuting to work, going home, sleeping, waking up and repeat! As well as being stuck in this routine, you get comfortable. You get comfortable with that monthly salary that blesses your account on the 25th of every month and then plot twist you suddenly shake things up by making this huge decision to return to education and you realise that your comforts no longer exist.
Over the year I worked that most craziest part time jobs and have come across the most craziest people within that process. In some places I can be completely honest and admit that I was treated like crap for being "overqualified". That's not even me blowing my own trumpet...I've had managers flat out tell me I was out to get them, even though that clearly wasn't the case. Throughout the year I had been 'Let go' and at other points I even just had to walk out! So many times I had to sit there questioning is this really worth it...I could literally just click my fingers and go back to comforts in the blink of an eye. But I knew what I had signed up for, no one said it was going to be easy.
Goodness, this feels deep and I haven't even started on the stress of studying itself. I honestly forgot what it was like to revise and consume large amounts of information. Getting used to reading my romantic novels and thrillers on my daily commutes into work was more my thing, but now I was sat here highlighting and reading all of these psychology journals, it was intense. Let me remind you I've been a media student for my entire life, nothing else ever interested me and now I was studying Psychology on a postgraduate level. The difference in courses and even teaching style was extremely different.
Driving those 90 miles a day became draining. Again, every day I got into the car I had to remind myself of why I was doing this in the first place. Going back to university as a postgraduate student is weird, because firstly you take things more seriously because you truly decided that you wanted to go back, no one really forced you this time, it wasn't really expected of you. This was your own damn choice ha! When you're an undergraduate, you have to deal with the whole trying to make friends situation, get used to living away from home etc. But this time around those issues don't really exist or just simply don't matter as much anymore. I feel like I had the mentality of "I've got my friends, I'm just coming here to do my work and go home". That worked for me, but sometimes I feel like I should have made slightly more of an effort with my peers to be honest.
By the time exam season arrived, I can admit I was a hot mess. The stress of it all and the ridiculous amounts of pressure I was putting on myself, was physically making me sick. There was so many points where I wanted to just throw in the towel, but my family and friends were constantly there to pick me up. Honestly words will never be able to express how grateful I am for them. All those sleepless nights and tears took their toll, yet my friends were there calling and whats apping me at random hours to make sure that I was okay. With every essay, they were there pushing me through, following my word count until I had finished and patiently waiting armed with bottles of prosecco at the finishing line... GO TEAM!
As the year draws to a close...I can happily say I made it! I survived the return to education! Came in with a Bachelors & left as a Postgrad. Even despite rewriting my entire dissertation in 48 hours..... lets not even go into that... I did make it though. It was an experience in itself! I had to sacrifice the things I loved, had to put a hold on my travels, I had to put a lot of personal things on pause. But looking back on it now it was worth it, because I achieved something I never thought I would. Bring on graduation!
2017 has taught me to not be comfortable and to not be afraid of giving myself a challenge. All the things I've wanted to achieve and pushed to the side because I thought I wasn't capable is basically bullshit! I'm not going to turn around and be cliche by saying "2018 is gonna be year!". But I will leave on this note...
Watch this space!
Wishing you all peace, love and laughter in 2018!
p.s. To my familia, Surf team, Muna, Eric and James...I couldn't have got through this year without you guys. Love you all!